Tree Fellers Wanted.

Richard (of RBB) told me this joke - he said it's okay for him to tell it because he's half Irish.

Two Irishmen are walking down a country road and they see a sign that says, "Tree fellers wanted."
One says to the other, "Tis a pity Sean's not here, we could have gone for that job."

Well, today I did some pruning, which is almost like tree felling.

It was hot work in the 30 degree heat - well it felt like 30 degrees!

The photos don't really show how much work it was. 

Let me tell you, it was bloody hot work!

Here's something that warms my heart!

THE BASS BAGGING HEXAGRAM.

Six blogs united in a quest to bring you the best possible blogging experience.

Akish The Philistine

Angry Jesus

Bin's Bass Bag

Richard's Bass Bag*

Richard's Bass Bag 2*

Richard's Bass Bag 3*

* the original bass bagging site

* putting the number '2' back into bass bagging

* the blog that's not too bad

Fill the void 5.

THE REHEARSAL.

Suit's script had a good story but it was badly written - bad grammar and shocking spelling. He denied this was the case.
I started playing some Swedish folk songs as the rehearsal started.
Suit's drama was a fantasy about a teacher named Bassam who advises a young couple, soon to be married, on how to live a good clean life.
Suit, as well as directing, had taken the part of Bassam - the lead character and the hero of the play.
Digger was cast as Hameed and Vehicle as Jawaher, which made sense because Jawaher was the only woman character. The Bassam character had most of the dialogue.
After a short while Suit stopped the rehearsal and said that Swedish folk music was not appropriate for a drama set in Bahrain. I told him I wasn't going to play whiny Bahrain traditional music and packed up my bass.
Digger said that my playing sounded nice, but I was too pissed off at this point to listen. Vehicle tried to calm me down too. As they practised the second scene, and their attention was diverted, I slipped out with my bass.

I'm actually bloody pleased to be out of it. I'll see Vehicle tomorrow when we clean the church after the morning services - those Catholics are a dirty lot! Vehicle will probably try to talk me into coming back, but I won't.

Fill the void 4

Evolution just doesn't measure up.

We did the church clean early this morning. I washed my hands in the holy water font and then sat and read a book while Vehicle finished off. Churches should really put soap by the holy water font for cleaners.
The book is called The Absolute Wrongness Of Evolution and is written by Dr Ivan Plato.

Dr Ivan Plato

Dr Plato is a scientist who has worked at Harvard* and The University Of Fiji. In his book he disproves all atheist scientists and shows, by Erenial Time Measurement, that the world is only 718 years old (exactly). This means that there just hasn't been time for evolution, except maybe among wasps, who evolve fast. Chapter One is titled The Mozart Delusion. Dr Plato shows how music attributed to Mozart was actually written on a super computer in the 1950s. He says that people who thought they were listening to Mozart before the 1950s were actually suffering from very poisonous wasp stings. There's a chapter on J.S.Bach but I haven't read that yet.

Just three more cleans to go then it's off to the Hire Company rehearsal. I'm taking my double bass and I'm going to suggest that I play some Swedish folk songs as the play unfolds. Sort of mood music. Suit says he has written a script for us to work from. I think he'll like my idea about the music.

You can learn a little bit about the Bahrain National Theatre - HERE.


* a society based in Foxton - not the American university

Fill the void 3.

Just got an email from my brother Digger. He wants to form a traditional Bahrain theatre troupe with Vehicle and I, along with our other brother Suit.
He proposes to call it the Hire Company.
I'm not that keen but Vehicle says I should give it a go as it would be nice to have all us siblings doing something together. Maybe I could play along on the bass while they act?
Digger thinks he's in charge, but just watch our oldest brother Suit take over!
The other two are still off work and want to have a practice tomorrow afternoon.
We'll have to get our cleaning done in the morning. Lucky we're not too busy yet!
Suit said we could rehearse at his place and he'd supply traditional Bahrain coffee afterwards.

Fill the void 2.

Bit of a quiet afternoon as we have no cleaning jobs booked.
Vehicle is laying on her bed reading the Quran.
Probably best if I go out before she starts quoting stuff.
I'll head down to the Hutt River. Damn I wish I had a dog!

Dogs like walking.

Is that true? Do dogs really like walking?
I wonder if there's anything about that in the Quran?
I know that the Quran seems to approve of dogs, even though they had a reputation among some as being dirty animals.
I wonder what God would call a dog, if he had one?
God and his dog. He'd probably just call him Dog, with a capital 'D'.
Oops, I just stood in a bit of dog shit! Dirty animals!

Early start tomorrow, up at 5am. I bet that lazy jobless bugger The Curmudgeon will still be in bed!

In Bahrain all old people work, unless they're filthy rich.

I like to listen to music while I clean.

Though, to be fair, I've only worked for one day so far. Three houses.

I assume that I'll continue to like to listen to music as I clean.

We've got a church to clean tomorrow. Maybe I'll say some blasphemous things in the church? My sister won't care because it's a Catholic church. The Quran probably doesn't give a shit about what you say in a Catholic church.

We'll see. Tomorrow is another day.

Fill the void 1.

"Fill the void" is a series of posts designed to 'fill the void' until Robert comes back.

A busy day on the road today.
I'm working with my sister Vehicle. Her name is an English translation of her original name in Bahrain.

That's my sister Vehicle Hire on the left.

We did three cleans in Newtown today. Gosh people are the same. The first house we went to had a Goldie painting and so did the second. The third was owned by a retired brain surgeon who was a really nice guy and asked me a question when I said I used to be a Science teacher.
"Why did you give up Science teaching?" he asked this morning.
I told him I needed a change and that I liked working with my sister. He paid me an extra $10 for the clean.

As we drive my sister likes to quote from the Quran (it's our first day but I guess this is how it will continue). I put my headphones on when it gets too much and listen to double bass music.
Today she quoted Quran 3:19; "The Imrans"
She said, "The only true faith in God's sight is Islam."
I thought of Robert. If Vehicle is right, Robert must be wrong.
Interesting.

I'll do some double bass practice when we get back home. My sister is living with me while she waits for an arranged marriage. I'm an atheist and don't have a wife or a girlfriend.

I don't know if Atheists can get arranged marriages in this country.

I wish I had a dog to walk down by the Hutt River.